Go To Your Dark Place

I’m going to say it again: There is no happy place.

When you really want results, you have to learn to go into the pain, into the dark spaces, into the blackness.

Happy won’t get you where you want to go. You can’t take your mind away from the pain if you want to achieve. You have to go straight at the pain and enter it. Live it. Breathe it. But I will say you don’t have to love it. (In fact, you’re going to scare me a little bit if you love the pain. I am so not into biting.)

Are you with me here?

When kind, misguided people say “Go to your happy place” in a workout, just tell them NO. Tell them that you won’t settle for happy places and mediocrity. You won’t settle for second best, second place, second banana.

You won’t take what you can get in this life, you’re going to take what you can EARN.

And if that means going into hell, well, okay then. Bring on the dark spaces. Bring on the night. Bring on hell. You’re ready.

Because the world is divided into two kinds of people: achievers and everybody else. It’s that simple. You either achieve . . .  or you settle. You compromise. You accept. You give in. You give up.

And you die. A little bit, day by day, “happy place” workout by “happy place” workout. Not just your body, but your soul.

Refuse to let that happen. Don’t be part of some weird science show where one of those flesh-eating bacteria morphed — except now it’s a soul-eating bacteria and it’s called “Good Job” . . . as in “Good job! You suck!”

Don’t do it. Don’t settle. Don’t take good job, good enough, or good to go. Demand better, best, outstanding from yourself. Be willing to pay the price. Sure, every day is not going to be a PR day, but that’s called accepting reality, not accepting mediocrity.

So, want your top performance, no matter what pain or discomfort you have to go through in order to get it from yourself. To you, knowing you did your best has to become more important than feeling good. You can feel good after you finish. Simply want it all. And be willing to walk through the fiery gates of hell to get there.

F*** the Happy Place. Say hello to success.

Print Friendly
10 comments
Eric Pelletier
Eric Pelletier

Lisbeth. Seriously, you are one of 2 or 3 blogger/CrossFitters who can write something that just makes me want to be better and better than I have ever been (CrossFit MC name drop). I't like you know that we are all just sitting here botching and whining, and you just pop up and say "Shut up. Seriously, get back to work!" It's amazing. I can't convey how much I just appreciate you just being you and inspiring me to say F*CK it to everything that stands between being the best Diabetic/CrossFitting/Coach I can possibly be. Thank you ... for everything. The info about affiliation, the Watertown web site, and just being a badass woman. Thanks :)

Haily
Haily

"Don't settle for pretty. Be HOT!" -Lisbeth Darsh It's my new mantra! Whey I share it with my friends they don't like it. Why? They say my goals aren't realistic. They say I work "too hard". They say that I am already 'hot'. (this is true) :) They say I'm too hard on myself. They say lots of things while they are sitting in their "Happy Place." Dr. Suess calls it "The Waiting Place". "A most useless place...for people just waiting....for their Uncle Jake or a pot to boil, or a Better Break, or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants, or a wig with curls, or Another Chance....Everyone is just waiting." Well, that's not for me! "Somehow I'll escape all that waiting and staying. I'll find the bright places where Boom Bands are playing!...Oh, the Places I'll GO!" It's a hard thing...this road called life. It sucks and it's SO easy to be happy in your ignorance, your lies, your denial! I say, BRING ON THE PAIN! I can't grow without it! I invite pain in! Things change because of pain! Lessons are learned because of pain! I feel happy becuase of my pain! Pain is my BFF! Without that bitch, I forget I'm SO STRONG!!!

Jane
Jane

Awesome read! Very motivating!

Mike
Mike

Lisbeth, one of the best essays ever!!! So true!

zach
zach

Loved this! But does this mean I shouldn't scream "Good job!" to clients during their WOD? Something I've been working to improve for myself and clients is figuring out what motivates people to go their "dark place".

admin
admin

Eric -- thank you! Just trying to do my best to help everyone I can help. Just like all of us as CrossFit coaches! I really appreciate your kind words. Thanks.

admin
admin

Go, Haily! Dr. Seuss + pain + hot = makes for a VERY interesting comment! Ha! You rock! As my boy Springsteen says, "You spend your life waiting for a moment that just don't come. Well, don't waste your time waiting."

admin
admin

Thanks, Michael!

admin
admin

Say whatever works for them! I have one member who likes to be told, "You look pretty." And that's cool! Only when words become the "nice pat on the head" are they probably not serving any purpose? Heck, I probably say "Good" waaaaaay too much. But you'll never hear me say "Perfect" because well, nothing ever is?

Trackbacks

  1. [...] of the Day: “Go To Your Dark Place” over on CrossFit [...]