Raise your hand if you’re struggling.
Did you do it? Or almost? Are you sitting in a public place and you’re like, “Um, I just raised my hand in Starbucks?”
Because the truth of life is that most of us are struggling but we don’t want to admit it.
Nobody wants to say, “Hey, me over here? I’m a mess. Can barely hold it together. My life is continuous all-new episodes of Shitshow Reality TV.”
See, men are supposed to be strong in our society and women are supposed to smile. Our kids are supposed to be perfect 24/7. Nobody is supposed to be having a hard time … except we all are.
I get it. I’ve been struggling lately, too. Me, the mindset person. The one who tells you how to get your shit together, who shows you how great life can be, the one who hugs life like a dog on speed every damn day.
Yup. Even me. Grinning as I come apart.
What do I do with that?
- Read my own words?
- Give me a pep talk?
- Call up Lisbeth to ask how Lisbeth can get her shit together?
Nope. Doesn’t work. (Believe me, I’ve tried.) I have to reach out to my network of peeps too because, like it or not, we don’t get better alone. We like to think we do. American society is obsessed with the independent success, the mythic lonesome cowboy, the hero who does it all herself. The only trouble is that’s a bunch of garbage.
Every single one of us improves with connection. Every single one.
Sure, there are some folks who want connection more than others (Hello, extroverts! Follow me!) but none of us gets better in isolation from each other.
We are social creatures. We rise and fall with each other.
And, when you think about it, that’s kind of really cool, this web of interdependence. We get better together. Our lives improve when we share our stories and our fears.
Tell your story and listen when people tell you theirs. I used to listen to Bruce Springsteen say in concert, “Nobody wins unless everybody wins” and I didn’t understand what he meant. I think I get it now.
So, I guess what I’m trying to say is when you’re struggling, reach out. It’s not the time to go it alone. The hard times are why we have friends – and, unless you’re a complete asshole, you have at least one friend. Lean on them.
Because the first step out of the struggle is to admit that you’re in it.
And get to the gym … but you knew I was going to say that. Keep going. I’ll be there too and you know I’m always rooting for you.